Wednesday, 28 December 2016

York in Colour and the things i do when im alone....

the music while you read [optional]: Holocene- Vitamin String Quartet Cover


lately i've been thankful for having time on my own.

i have now had 11 weeks without a phone and its been a healthy thing, a good thing. 


im really good at being alone.

you should know what 'alone' is not the same as 'lonely', they are different things. 

here are some things i like to do when i am alone:

> take long walks, its easy for me to lose track of time now, i also don't own a watch. i think its good for us to lose track of time every now and then...
> i spend time writing. i find writing helps me process my experiences in life. i also write postcards to friends and family, i've sent over 100 in the last 8 months.

> i sing out loud/ i listen to new music. New music always makes me engage in the moment because its not something already familiar to me. I love singing and any opportunity when others aren't around, is an opportunity for me to sing. 

> i allow my mind to 'wander'. i use that word because a lot of the time, when life gets busy, i tend to keep my thoughts focused and will cut off those wandering thoughts; that usually lead to beautiful things like ideas and bravery.
So when i have time on my own i make sure i allow my thoughts to wander as far as they may. 

> i actively smile and make eye-contact. its very easy to forget to smile and there is some science behind why its good for you. For me, it is a physical response to thankfulness and a fun thing for the strangers around me. 

> i go to a place i've never been before. In a very small way, this helps me break habits of comfort and familiarity. That i don't want in my life.



> i try something i don't know much about. like cooking something i've never made before or trying a way of art that i've never used. eg- recently i went to my first life drawing class in London.

> i watch a movie, just cos i like movies. 

> i lay on the ground for a while. I used to do it for a whole song, usually 3-5 minutes, just to prove to myself that i can be still. i don't have music with me now, cos i don't have a phone so i just guess how many minutes go by while i look up into the sky #seewhatididthere? 



> i talk to a nearby stranger, like i said before alone doesn't have to mean lonely. 

> I will make a piece of art and hide it under my bed. one of these days i'll frame something and hang it on a wall.  

> i will write lists. lists help me prioritise things.

> i am content to take myself out for a meal- breakfast, lunch or dinner. 
> as much as i love my own time, its really wonderful to have amazing humans in your life too.


and York was really pretty.



Wednesday, 23 November 2016

Thoughts in York

the music while you read [optional]:Take Me by Sisyphus

the first and the last...

Rosie picked me up and showed me around.

up on the hillside where that part of me comes apart.


it takes me 59 minutes to settle in.

Ekklesia


if only i could be as proud of myself, as you say you are of me.

you only need the sugar when the coffee is bad. it wasn't.


 i had a dream that i found all that was missing.


You only know what you know,

until you learn to grow.

then you can know more,

than only what you know.

fear is a choice.



its the only time, aside from when i'm dreaming, that i'm ok with my mind being elsewhere.

the fullest full stop

not much to see when you're in the dark.


This place was a shelter. 


walk with me.


= it might be over soon =

= Susan takes you down to her place, near the river... =

= you want to travel with Him, you want to travel blind.


you know you can trust Him, for He's touched your perfect body with Him mind. =