Three months in Greece; disposable mistakes...

I walked from Miami to Burleigh beach and talked about this today.

I worked in Crete during the European summer of 2017.

Everything about it was interesting for me; 

from the humans, 

to the adventures,

to the culture and the sea and 

my place within it all. 

I was reminded of just how much time I need on my own. 

Almost everyday after work, I would come here and float in the sea...
[I got in trouble once by of the locals for calling it the ocean.] 

I would dive down as deep as I could in one breath.

It was different everyday; and all along i knew it was unlike anything else and unlike anything I'll experience again.

The relationships were hard.

Their hobbies seemed to be sex and alcohol. They didn't understand I needed time away. It had nothing to do with them and everything to do with regaining my energy.

As much as I love people- and I do; they drain me.

*** S A N T O R I N I ***

I knew that gratitude was the key to getting through that season well; the rough dynamics, the strange isolation contrasted with the beauty of everything my eyes could take in.

There was a lot to be thankful for, so I tried to hold all that tightly in front of me.

The farther away I get from the experience, the better it becomes in my mind. It's a strange thing but I like that. 

Humans were made for learning... 

and for other things too, I guess. 

When I was 8 I nearly drowned in the ocean.
I was never afraid, I've only ever loved it.

Greece was everything all at once.

#1stworldproblems...

#abouttoday...
"the 'sleeping bus' was more like an adventure ride at movieworld; the only difference being- that is simulated; this is real...
we got on the bus at 5:30pm, the man made us take off our shoes and put them in a bag . Since my shoes had buckles, they were difficult to loosen and before i could even undo one shoe, the bus was moving with the door still open and the shoe man pulled me toward him just in time to save me for being road kill.

we walked down the narrow isle to the very back of the bus; bunkbeds all the way through. i laid down on the top level, next to the window. Bright blue, red and orange lights lined the roof and the Vietnamese music awards were playing on the TV. I looked outside and wondered why this is called '3rd world' and why is mine '1st'? and where is the 2nd? and what does it look like? arent humans so adaptable... and arent problems relative? and do they use the hashtag #thirdworldproblems? and do they have problems because they think they do or because the '1st world' tells them they do...and isn't it only in comparing "worlds" and things and lives that we come to believe we are "so different"? and is it wrong to see something as beauty when it seems equally as devastating as it is beautiful? 

i dont know how anyone could sleep on the 'sleeping bus', i saw two people throw-up. The driver is constantly beeping the horn as the traffic is kinda crazy and then what i can only assume as giant pot holes in the road, so big, that when the bus hits one your whole body gets flung into the air and i dont mean once or twice. There's random intervals throughout the night where the driver puts on the red and blue light- right above my face and i wake up from what i can only describe as- 'eyes closed/using my imagination to pretend im somewhere else'. The sensation of moving while lying down was so strange for me that for a second, after i 'woke' i forgot i had legs- i couldn't feel them... in saying all that, my honest thought was that it was a rare and interesting (almost enjoyable) experience."

#home

#abouttoday...

"its warm here, laying in the room, Saigon. The fan is blue and orange, i like it and as it spins it blows the white sheets hanging above and in front of me. They gave me my own room for the price of the dorm- "my own room" also doubles as their laundry room and its found on very top floor and i don't mind at all. Actually i like it; my own space, balcony, huge bed and a place to hang my first attempt at hand-washed clothes.
There is something luxurious about the freedom of having a midday shower and even though the shower system is a little different to what im used to; i have indulged in this simple joy at any opportunity while being here. 
i had lunch with Leo, a make up artist from new york that i met on the twenty-five cent bus from the airport to the city [much better that the taxi ride that cost me $45 USD the day i arrived in Ho Chi Minh #heavilyrippedoff #classictourist] 
Leo knew a great street food place, the walk was good, the lotus flower is in bloom beautifully this time of year and allamanda and orchids I notice everywhere. over lunch i mentioned to him that i seem to think ive already had the most delicious mean i could have here and then you try something even better and for $1!! #what??! every dish here comes with chili, soy sauce and cucumber on the side; i have a new appreciation for condiments but i can live without the cucumber. It was great meeting Leo, he is very generous with his knowledge, time and money and was very considerate of others.

We went to Anh's bubble tea shop and Huy and Lee where there making jewellery. They said to me that they thought i had already been back a couple of days and i was avoiding them. i laughed and explained that i had to do Ha Long Bay. None of them had been there, its true- you don't usually see much of your own country. I would like to know australia more. To KNOW Australia, haha. That's how Danny would always put it- "i want to know Hoi An" she'd say, "i want to know the beaches..." i like hearing it that way.

i watched the sunset in Vietnam from gate 20; through the glass window in the airport and i was thankful that the day was coming to an end. im forgetting the days and dates and never look at the time unless im hungry or need to be at the airport. This adventure hasn't necessarily made me see a better side to human nature but it has made me see a lot of things...
a friend of mine said that when you travel you see how much the 'tall poppy syndrome' is so prevalent in Australia. I remember Dennys said she thinks Australia is perfect, i said no where in this world is perfect but some where is home.
i think home is a feeling; that consists of love and time and trying to understand and wanting to know and a cuddle or maybe more than one... its nurtured in the place where you spend your time. For me, that is Australia."

#waterlife

i wish that no one lived by the beach
i wish that land was free
for all-
to stay on
to play on
to holiday on

i wish that when i walked down the street;
the ocean would sweep me off my feet
i wish that while driving my car;
i wouldn't have to look far
to see the deep blue sparkling

i wish that wherever i go
the sea would know
and it would be right there to find me


i don't like to surf or collect shells,
i'm not that interested in sea-life or
building sandcastles and
i don't even want to swim;

it's just that when im so close to something
so blue, big and grand-
i feel so much closer to Him.